From my early ages on I was fascinated by the fast, glamorous fashion industry. Five years after my first internship I was working in fashion and made my Bachelor in Commerce and Trade. I’ve passionately read all the Fashion Magazines and worked hard to achieve my own set goals. My career developed step by step as the years went on.
I had an incredible life concerning my age: a beautiful apartement in Munich, enough money to live comfortably and travel as well, a job I was dedicated to, friends who always pushed me and inspired me and a family who loved me. Nevertheless I had always the yearning for more. On my 31st birthday I decided to travel the world for a year, to make new experiences and get out of my comfort zone. The company I worked for since years offered me a Sabbatical and half year a later I was on my way.
I travelled from Barcelona, to Indonesia, Australia, New Zealand, Fiji, Hawaii and Costa Rica. I’ve danced Salsa. I participated into a month of self-awareness. I began to meditate every day. And I found my passion in surfing and a deep healing love to the Ocean. Due to surfing and meditation, I connected to something I had not experienced before. I felt a profound sense of joy and peace that emanated from deep within me. It was so different to anything I had experienced before because it was not dependent on external conditions. In the past I was happy because of something – a boy, a job, exclusive holidays… Up until this point I had lived my life completely at the whim of circumstances. I defined myself through my success in my job and my numbers of friends. And as a result I felt insecure in myself and about my life. Surfing and my daily meditation routine changed that forever.
Upon returning to Germany I began a new job: Division Manager for a luxury fashion brand I haven’t even dared to dream to work for. Logically, I have been enthusiastic about the faith they had in me and the new challenges. Next to it, I continued the path I had already started on my travel: to become a Business Coach and help support people in their daily working life.
Although there were aspects to being a Division Manager that I deeply enjoyed, I increasingly began to question whether it was the right path. After a while, I was constantly stressed out, anxious and tired. I looked around and saw that most my colleagues experienced the same issues, sometimes even worse. In fact, I had watched depressions and panic attacks affect friends and family before but couldn’t fully understand it until it happened to me. Not being fully commited to my life situation and still struggling to find my way made me sick. My job wasn’t making me happy anymore, but I wasn’t able to let it go since it had been such a strong point in my life for so many years.
Amidst the business of my corporate life, I maintained a regular meditation practice and even started to paddle with my surfboard on a river to be ready for the next surf adventure. I missed the Ocean every day and if I was able to escape for a couple of days, I flew to the Basque Country, the Canary Islands or to Central America to get in the water. Only there I could let go.
I began to dive deeper into the world of surfing and meditation, with a specific interest of their applications to depression and burn out because I could see that it kept me healthy. Maybe what works for me could work for others as well! And that is where everything connected – my coaching study, my meditation, my love to the Ocean and surfing. I might be able to give back what I’ve received on my travels. I could combine surfing, meditation and coaching to support others to improve their life situation.
But how could I give it all up? What would people think? Who would I be without my job? How should I even make a business out of that? What if I fail? These questions overwhelmed me.
Eventually the pain of living an inauthentic life became too big. I didn’t want to wake up when I was 80 and wish that I would have had the courage to change. I had no elaborated plan but at vision at least. In the end, I’ve quit my job and moved to Dominical, Costa Rica.
When I jumped for the first time into an unknown and new life in Costa Rica, I was surprised by the difficulty of it, but even in these moments of sadness and loneliness I refused to give up. After I left everything behind which pulled me down, my life started to magically work out. I’ve passed my exams in Business Coaching, I found a variaty of jobs including being a Surf Instructor and surfed almost every day. It was the first time of my life I felt connected to myself and my surrounding. I felt home.
In May 2018 I made my dream become reality. Blu Hour Retreat is my way to inspire women to get out of their comfort zone and to discover what they really crave in life. Learn more about the Retreat and the incredible women working with me! Become part of our Community!